Society’s crashing Ladder: Where will you be when it crumbles?
By Johnathan “Woody” Woodbeck
What kind of car do you drive? Are those Prada? How much do you make? Any of these questions sound familiar? Maybe it’s because you have either asked them recently or been asked them. If you have been asked them, they you are in my camp, one full of remorse for what this “gay society” of ours is becoming or should I say HAS become. Driven predominantly on how a person looks, what they are wearing, how white are their smile, how big are their muscles, and how much money they make; the tragic beings we once mocked are exactly what we are all turning into. I am not counting myself out; I am occasionally finding myself falling into the West Hollywood curse of accepting these things, these standards as “normal” behavior. Well who exactly is defining this so-called normal behavior and who says I want to be normal if this is the way it is. I am so over our society, who to the rest of the world that isn’t gay, are constantly defending who we are, what we do, and our entire existence on a daily basis then in our sad but true fashion we do a 180 and start tearing into one another and bringing our own gay social ladder to the ground. As we beg for the world to become more tolerant of who we are we continue to attack our own people and berate them for doing just that. You know what I am talking about; the snickers and turn of heads as two older men walk by holding hands dressed in khaki target shorts with Hawaiian print short sleeve button down shirts walk past you in the heart of Boyztown, or how about a group of transsexuals walk by and one of you shout, “Nice heals”, or when a big man is out in a club and you laugh as he tries to find his way to the bar as people try to find there way around him. You have done it, I have done it; we all have done it. I am not a gloried gay; I just know my flaws and embrace them. I accept them and make them apart of who I am and I grow stronger everyday because of it. I will celebrate my 3 year anniversary of having Gastric bypass this July and I have lost over 300 pounds. Now someone the other night said to me, “you know that really deep down inside the reason you did it was because of society, you can’t be gay and fat…” and for a split second, a moment, a fraction, I realized he was right. I immediately wanted to say “NO WAY!” but I couldn’t if I did I would have been a liar. Granted the surgery for me was the best thing ever to happen, it honestly and truthfully saved my life and without it I probably wouldn’t be in California living and doing what I have always dreamed of doing, sadly I would probably be back in Upstate NY selling cell phones…still. But deep down in side, I knew the major reason I did the surgery was my serious and life threatening health issues but couldn’t deny that since the surgery I have been dating more, hooking up more, making out more; I mean I just lost my virginity just 1 ½ years ago and I’m 24. It has become incredibly easy for me to meet guys now and get to know them. So I stood there stunned, defending myself and my decision to have the surgery and stopped. There is no need for justification of this matter. I know no matter what some random guy in the bar says to me, personally I did what had to be done. Enough said! The point I am trying to get to is that what ever happened to just practicing what w preach; you do you; I do me. You want to live your life however you want to live it then do so. All I ask is that along the way, think before you speak, if you feel like you can talk smack be ready to back it up to people like me who will call you on it and back it up to yourself. Think about what you have to be proud of, think back to how you treat those around you, Karma is a bitch that has a lethal bite. This is it, my chance to stand out and say it “No these are not Prada, I make just enough to pay for all of my student loans and car payment, and I drive a 2002 Jeep Liberty that needs a wash; if you got a problem with any of that, get to stepping, just make sure its not under my ladder!”
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
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